A POST FULL OF SHAME

 

For starters, I DO NOT INTEND TO PUBLISH THIS POST. But for the sake of a good read, I will. This is my point of view of the generation today, which may or may not change for the next couple of years. I am not aware when this kind of trend started but I bet it had been going on for a long time now. Who started it – probably our ancestors? When did it started – ages ago? Where? EVERYWHERE.

I am talking about what everyone are so fond of doing – SEX.

For this post I am going to use the experience from one of my friends who will not be named for the sake of her well-being and so-called reputation. This post is based on the culture of our country and our current lifestyle. Any similarity to anyone you know is purely coincidental – or it may not be, whatever.

“Love is so overrated.”

 

That’s what she taught me – yes taught, because she insisted firmly that it’s a lesson to be learned. My friend – let’s call her Iron Maiden – had once loved so much before. “Those with iron hearts once loved purely long ago.” She used to say to me. I used to shrug it off since Iron Maiden is very fond of her one-liners. Long story short – she was hurt by the man she loved and made her the Iron Maiden she is now. If I will describe my friend the Iron Maiden – she loves “the game”.

What game, you might ask?

“The Game of Lust” Iron Maiden would say with her crooked smile. She’s the kind of person who’s very open with “sex talks” and us – her friends – just got used to it over time. We’re actually open-minded about it, since none of us are minors. “Learn to play the game. No man will take you seriously anymore, so why take them seriously at all? If they’re playing you, then why not play them too? It’s all a silly game. It’s whether you win or lose. If you fall for them, you lose. Play with them and you win.”

 

At first I couldn’t believe this kind of mindset, since I grew up from a small city in the province. People aren’t used of this kind of liberation, though we are aware that it’s already the norm for other countries where high school or college students can have premarital sex during parties without parental supervision. But it’s different here in our country… years ago, I guess. Now, if you go to our capital, you can see that sex is such an easy thing to do nowadays – with anyone you like and anywhere you like.

And that’s the kind of generation I see in us today.

Go to a bar, get drunk, dance with a guy you totally don’t know, start making out and end up having sex in the nearby motel. When you wake up in the morning, you don’t exchange numbers (depending on the situations or mutual attraction, I guess) and then leave like nothing happened. And if the night come again, do the exact same thing. THIS, LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, IS A FACT NO ONE CAN DENY FROM ANYBODY. In the US, Asia, Europe and everywhere else – this kind of trend is at its peak.

“Fall in love when you’re thirty. Fuck while you’re still up for it.” Iron Maiden would tell us. But when I look at her and see beneath that mask of invincibility – what I see is someone who is afraid to fall in love again. Love breaks even the strongest people. People who are basically afraid to get hurt again would put up this bravado that they don’t know how to care anymore or that they’re only up for fun and nothing else. This is kind of sad, because I had witnessed a lot of great people crumble after heart-break. There’s this girl who I’ll call Miss Corn-Head – young, smart and pretty – that got played by the boy she’s terribly in love with. And now all she wants to do is sulk, walk and do things alone. I always urged her to move on, help herself and live life to the fullest – but she refused many times.

Heart-break made this kind of generation? Let me ask you if it’s true, though.

Is it because that too many heart-breaks happened that people, even teens, these days prefer to play and fuck around rather than maintain serious relationships? Is it because that they are afraid that love will only break them that they’d turn to lust instead? Will this generation be saved?

With divorce here and there – who could answer with assurance?

This is just sad.

I know lust and sex existed ages ago, but they cannot compare to pure love. I know I might sound so old-fashioned or stupid or naïve or innocent to you guys, but I actually am not. I am also a child of this generation. But is it wrong to hope for something from the past?

I’d be terrified if I find out someday that my future daughter will have her first sex at the age of 15, or that my son can get someone pregnant without even graduating from high school. Both of these are possible, since teens are given way more freedom than they ought to have. I am not going as a psycho disciplinarian here, I know you parents or young adults do understand.

I just wish that this generation could have been molded in a much better way – a way that could never have made someone like the Iron Maiden. I hope for a generation with less pornography, rape, abortion, premarital sex and underage pregnancies. I know it’s too much to ask, but hoping is free. I hope that my son can grow up in a community where he doesn’t have the privilege to fuck every girl he likes in every party he get himself into. I hope that this generation can teach him the value of purity and saving yourself for the right person. I, too, made this kind of mistake, I am not a hypocrite nor virgin. But is it wrong to ask a better life or future for your children? Is it wrong to aim for a better lifestyle for the coming generation that we will eventually leave?

Changing this generation is as hard as a diamond, like waiting for the tallest and grandest of mountains to crumble into dust. This is me expressing my disappointment. I had made these mistakes before too, and I do not intend to do it again. I am revolted to how easily sex can be gained – recklessly and irresponsibly. I do hope for the better days, when dignity and purity and sanity can be taught back to the children. I do hope – with all I am – that one day I will still be able to see that “Game of Lust” all forgotten and a generation at the right track, leaving the filthy past behind.

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How To Control Anger

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WHAT MAKES A PERSON ANGRY? I tend to ask myself that question whenever I ponder about things I shouldn’t. In my case, I’m the kind of person that gets pissed quite easily. I think that’s understandable, for myself, since I can also be impatient in some situations. So I can say that I don’t have the patience  for people who really wants me angry.

Then I ask myself, what makes me angry?

  • OFFENSIVE JOKES
  • SNIDES / SIDE COMMENTS
  • ARROGANCE
  • INSENSITIVITY
  • DISAPPOINTMENT
  • BULLYING
  • BROKEN PROMISES

For me, that list is pretty basic. And most of them usually can come from other people who could inflict the factor of me being angry. But the major question is – what do I do when I get angry?

Trust me, I know it’s cliche and all, but you don’t want to make me angry.

My personality is very strong, and I do retaliate instantly whenever someone harasses me. I’m not the kind of person who would keep to myself and back down when I am offended. I am very vocal with what I feel and I’d say what I want to say. It’s like, I’m the type of person that wouldn’t permit others to look down on me if I can help it.

Conclusion? All hell break loose.

I usually end up fighting with someone when I’m angry. Especially if the other person wouldn’t back down too, it’ll be nasty. If I get offended, I wouldn’t be the one to make space and just let it be. That person would have to answer to me and apologize if he did anything wrong.

For me, I find myself brave and independent. But I didn’t realize that it’s a bad habit and sometimes I must keep my cool instead of bursting out with anger. I didn’t think that I’m coming out as arrogant as the person doing it to me – and I was actually horrified to be such a person.

So what changed me? Eventually, I decided that I need to control my anger. Since I started on my current job – which involved teamwork and relationship with my co-workers – I learned that patience is a must. I reflected on myself and found out that I can be insensitive and arrogant when I’m angry… which are the exact things that makes me mad in the first place. At first I had a hard time mingling with my co-workers because of my personality and the way that I can easily get mad. Thankfully, our sessions of discussing relationships and personalities helped me changed my ways.

HOW DO I CONTROL MY ANGER?

Before, when I’m angry, I’d talk a lot in a very loud manner. But now, when I get pissed at someone, I’d give myself space. I’d separate myself from that person so that I wouldn’t get more annoyed whenever I see him. When a person is angry, the brain tends to stop thinking rationally – meaning that an angry person wouldn’t listen to anything but to what he/she wants to believe. So the space and silence will give you time to think rationally and calm yourself down. It does works for me. I’d stop myself from saying anything and leave the room. After a few minutes of sitting alone somewhere, I’d come to realize that what pissed me off isn’t that much of a big deal. Also, distractions can help. Listen to music or think about something else rather than linger on what or whoever makes you angry. After awhile, I managed to keep this kind of habit and avoid getting angry in an instant. It did help my relationship with my teammates and somehow we did got along well through the process. I learned that I shouldn’t jump into a fight all at once and give myself time to think in a humane way. Life became more positive and it also improved my personality. Anger is a natural thing for us people, but it shouldn’t be exercised or tolerated.

Anger can become sinful when it is motivated by pride (James 1:20), when it is unproductive and thus distorts God’s purposes (1 Corinthians 10:31), or when anger is allowed to linger (Ephesians 4:26-27). One obvious sign that anger has turned to sin is when, instead of attacking the problem at hand, we attack the wrongdoer.

– GotQuestions.Org

You cannot take anger out of our lives but at least we can control it and place it at the right place and time. Unnecessary anger will do nothing but give you unwanted trouble or most-probably – ruin your life. Do not live in anger or divulge in it since it can be the poison to the happiness of your life. Learn how to be patient, sensitive and humble. I did.