WHAT MAKES A PERSON ANGRY? I tend to ask myself that question whenever I ponder about things I shouldn’t. In my case, I’m the kind of person that gets pissed quite easily. I think that’s understandable, for myself, since I can also be impatient in some situations. So I can say that I don’t have the patience for people who really wants me angry.
Then I ask myself, what makes me angry?
- OFFENSIVE JOKES
- SNIDES / SIDE COMMENTS
- BROKEN PROMISES
For me, that list is pretty basic. And most of them usually can come from other people who could inflict the factor of me being angry. But the major question is – what do I do when I get angry?
Trust me, I know it’s cliche and all, but you don’t want to make me angry.
My personality is very strong, and I do retaliate instantly whenever someone harasses me. I’m not the kind of person who would keep to myself and back down when I am offended. I am very vocal with what I feel and I’d say what I want to say. It’s like, I’m the type of person that wouldn’t permit others to look down on me if I can help it.
Conclusion? All hell break loose.
I usually end up fighting with someone when I’m angry. Especially if the other person wouldn’t back down too, it’ll be nasty. If I get offended, I wouldn’t be the one to make space and just let it be. That person would have to answer to me and apologize if he did anything wrong.
For me, I find myself brave and independent. But I didn’t realize that it’s a bad habit and sometimes I must keep my cool instead of bursting out with anger. I didn’t think that I’m coming out as arrogant as the person doing it to me – and I was actually horrified to be such a person.
So what changed me? Eventually, I decided that I need to control my anger. Since I started on my current job – which involved teamwork and relationship with my co-workers – I learned that patience is a must. I reflected on myself and found out that I can be insensitive and arrogant when I’m angry… which are the exact things that makes me mad in the first place. At first I had a hard time mingling with my co-workers because of my personality and the way that I can easily get mad. Thankfully, our sessions of discussing relationships and personalities helped me changed my ways.
HOW DO I CONTROL MY ANGER?
Before, when I’m angry, I’d talk a lot in a very loud manner. But now, when I get pissed at someone, I’d give myself space. I’d separate myself from that person so that I wouldn’t get more annoyed whenever I see him. When a person is angry, the brain tends to stop thinking rationally – meaning that an angry person wouldn’t listen to anything but to what he/she wants to believe. So the space and silence will give you time to think rationally and calm yourself down. It does works for me. I’d stop myself from saying anything and leave the room. After a few minutes of sitting alone somewhere, I’d come to realize that what pissed me off isn’t that much of a big deal. Also, distractions can help. Listen to music or think about something else rather than linger on what or whoever makes you angry. After awhile, I managed to keep this kind of habit and avoid getting angry in an instant. It did help my relationship with my teammates and somehow we did got along well through the process. I learned that I shouldn’t jump into a fight all at once and give myself time to think in a humane way. Life became more positive and it also improved my personality. Anger is a natural thing for us people, but it shouldn’t be exercised or tolerated.
Anger can become sinful when it is motivated by pride (James 1:20), when it is unproductive and thus distorts God’s purposes (1 Corinthians 10:31), or when anger is allowed to linger (Ephesians 4:26-27). One obvious sign that anger has turned to sin is when, instead of attacking the problem at hand, we attack the wrongdoer.
You cannot take anger out of our lives but at least we can control it and place it at the right place and time. Unnecessary anger will do nothing but give you unwanted trouble or most-probably – ruin your life. Do not live in anger or divulge in it since it can be the poison to the happiness of your life. Learn how to be patient, sensitive and humble. I did.